This time, I didn't even bring you the entire deal. I just took a screen shot of what was visible from my inbox because that was enough. I don't even have a joke about the content of the description -- it's res ipsa loquitor ridiculous.
"Like a cat atop a fence at midnight, yowling toxins and excess waste tend to loiter until someone blasts them away with a hose. Brook no obnoxious bacteria with today's Groupon to Sacred Waters Wellness Arts Studio in Fayetteville..."
I wanted to make a joke about this new age-y place for colon hydrotherapy (I mean "water poop") using this Middle English word, so I googled "brook verb origins." Eventually I would come to learn that "brook" is an archaic and rarely used term for "tolerate" or "put up with," but the very first thing I found was:
WHAT THE DAMN HELL SHIT, DICTIONARY?? In the sentence, "I could hear the sound of a babbling brook," BROOK IS NOT A VERB! BROOK IS A NOUN! YOUR DEFINITION OF "A SMALL STREAM" DESCRIBES A NOUN. YOU ARE A DICTIONARY. WTF, WEDNESDAY??!?!?
So, thank you for that, internet. Now I know that at least 45 people in the Atlanta area got a discount on hosing our their colon today, and that I cannot trust dictionaries to know rudimentary parts of speech. Your utter ridiculousness and inanity just made me write a See You Next Tuesday on a Wednesday, which is sad and wrong. But I won't brook idiots, internet, I won't brook them.